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05 October 2011

I am an I am today

I am concerned. 

How do you explain to a 6-year-old that she doesn't have to blame her peer if he doesn't want to play with her, because very soon things will change and it'll be him to wants to spend time with girls? What a sweet revenge, by then! We had to deal with a ballet block too. She says she's too shy for solo dancing. I believe she doesn't feel to master the technique yet, she switched from modern dance to ballet only this year after all. Life is made of obstacles, that's a fact. I'm here for helping my dauther overcome her first ones. How hard! I'm not sure I do well every time around. I'd like to have the wise and proper words to help, support and make her feel secure, just like when she cries and I rescue her in my arms. "You don't know how I feel, mom, you just don't know!" she cried today over her block. It just breaks my heart.

I am ridiculous. 

Nobody eats salads in Mc Donalds. True. I wouldn't even enter a fast food if I wanted to eat healthy. It's probably what I'm going to do during my imminent getaway to Verona. I'll order a salad and a burger, so that I can have a complete diet meal when I'm allowed carbs. I'm saving those jolly days for the weekend, since I'll be out and about and with a strict budget. Right now I'm in the hideous phase wehre usual clothes are large and it's early days for the ones I'd like to fit in, so I don't even know what to wear. Buying new jeans now is silly. I'm a couple of kg away from my goal. And I definitely don't want to ruin everything at this point. Being on the lookout for diet food will be a changeling during this trip.

I am perplex. 

There are times when I force myself to watch tv, because of this sarcastic urge to swim with the crowd and see what's all the fuss about it. I haven't found a single, interesting show yet. I'm ashamed by the huge quantity of make up anchormen and women wear. They're living masks. Maybe it's just me and my pathetic isolation from that world. I don't know. I just hope I'm not the only alien out there. 

I am stupefied.

There are people who live to notice every single mistake out there. Looks like they're waiting for you to do the wrong move and file to superiors. We recently had our old sofas moved out by 3 guys. The kids must have damaged a bit of the hall entrance wall on their way out. Nobody noticed. My next door neighbor did, but only because he had to start renovation works next day and he didn't want to be accused for something he didn't do. Too bad he's nowhere to be found when we've to pay for something in common on the third floor we share. Foxy guy I know, huh?

I am discouraged.

A "Better dead than sorry" t-shirt was seen today in a shop in Castellammare di Stabia. Decency has no limits. 

And I am surprised.

Amanda Knox and Raffaele Sollecito were acquitted of murder and freed yesterday. I can't stop thinking about the victim's family, who is looking at things again and trying to understand how a decision that was so certain two years ago has been so emphatically overturned now. They must be shocked.

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