a woman can be tough

paracetamol and thermometer are my best friends these days, since ali keeps feeling sick. it's been pretty exhausting, her temperature has unreasonable peaks. it was particularly tough last night, and she's not eating properly. when al got back from moscow and saw her tonight, he was shocked, he said she had lost far too much weight. well, she'll gain it back. important is she gets well and fast. important is she doesn't lose motivation and keeps doing what she likes. after all, it's true kids fall sick all the time, but it's also true that they recover quickly. bless them!

i had time to watch the end of the movie i had missed the night ali started feeling very sick, the burning plain. it's screenwriter arriaga's directorial debut, springboarding off the successof the films he made with director inarritu (21 grams and babel). like babel, which i loved, the film features different converging storylines told from different perspectives at varying times in the characters lives. i prefer multiple plots to the chronological, i like finding myself engrossed with the frst story and then realizing i've been following the story without problems when everything else falls into place.

also i liked the music. it's from the official soundtrack, composed by omar rodríguez-lópez and hans zimmer. it was surreal and constatly dramatic. but what i essentially liked was the way the movie explored the delicate line on which people walk throughout their whole lives in order to avoid being hurt. there comes a point in everybody's life when one must choose to keep running from the things that cause us pain or confront them head-on and suffer the consequences and or reap the benefits.

i had my moment this past june. there was no happy end for me like in the movie, though. i had to decide for myself how much pushing around i will and not will accept. the decision was drastic, i'm still learning to live with a missing piece of my heart. life tauhgt me that i can't change others attitude but that i can change mine. and i'm someone who learns learn from her past and not repeat it. i'm not responsible for others problems, i need to to survive emotionally.

i wonder when my family's point will come. will it ever be one? i doubt it. they are unable to state a problem in the first palce, so the problem cannot be solved. and someone cannot give you an orange if e doesn't have one, right? even if he keeps telling you he has lots, maybe. so, like my special friend sandra said somewhere in this blog, better be safe than sorry! better look tough!